I was living in Mexico on a summer program for Spanish and I was having a weekly phone call with my (now) husband back home.
“I saw the new doctor today. He says he can help me. He says I should stop drinking milk,” he said, as if it was a perfectly normal conversation topic.
Somehow the word “milk” snapped me back to the conversation. I asked, “All milk? Like cheese, yogurt, everything? ICE CREAM?”
“Everything. But if it’ll make me better, I want to try it,” he said, a firmness to his voice.
“Then I want to support you. Tell me what you need me to help with and do, and I’m in. I don’t think it’ll be easy, but I’m in.”
And that short conversation started a journey we are still on – a journey of working with what we eat to help our bodies heal themselves.
Now I’m not telling you this because I want to argue any eating or food-driven lifestyle choices. As my husband would tell you, he’s the researcher on our journey and I’m the evangelist.
No, I’m sharing this because this is a HUGE part of my respect story. Little did I know that 6 years ago when I agreed to make dairy-free meals for the guy I was dating that it would mean that I would do all of the “crazy” hippy/pioneer things I do. Things that when I tell people almost always elicits a “Really? You actually DO that?”
So what are things that I do? This is not an exhaustive list by any means but off the top of my head:
- make yogurt
- make stock
- render lard
- freeze/can produce
- make alternative flours
- make personal care products
- cook almost everything from scratch
- make cleaning products
- wear 5 finger shoes
- and more
Please don’t see this list as bragging because I’m still a mess – still simultaneously a saint and a sinner. I don’t have a perfect marriage or family or house (and if you could see it right now you’d know I was exaggerating.)
I give you this list to let you know that what I do and who I am is bigger than a respect/marriage blogger. My journey encompasses alllllllllllll kinds of things.
And so does yours.
I can’t believe some days what that means I’m willing to do for my husband and family, especially some of the pioneer stuff. But I love it! I love love love doing this for my family.
And so I tell you this for two reasons:
1) You may be surprised what you start doing along your respect journey. And just because it’s “weird” or not like anyone else you know doesn’t mean it’s bad. It’s your journey. Embrace it. And find things to love about it.
2) If any of you reading this are hippy/pioneer/crunchy/granola ladies, who doesn’t love talking shop a little? 😉
What I did for love? (for respect?) I learned how to use more time in the kitchen and make food in a different way.
Today, I just want to encourage you in your journey. Whatever that looks like today and 6 years from now.
Would you share something that you are surprised you are doing? Or where you are living? Or handling something? Because you decided to respect?
Would love to hear it!
And, there’s just a few hours left for the GIVEAWAY! Check it out and get in on the fun!
Grace says
Your blog really helped me today. God used it to speak to my heart about an issue that has been weighing heavy on my heart and I’ve been much in prayer over. I’m trying to respect and submit while still dating, and it’s not easy in today’s world! Everybody around me screams advice for the opposite.
I’m dating a wonderful, Christian man who is a widower. He and I were friends first, then we started dating. I’m normally very controlling, but I am striving to do this the right way, God’s way. One of the hardest parts for me is learning to trust my boyfriend (sounds weird saying that as old as he and I are) with his family and timing for us to truly date. His adult children aren’t ready for him to date yet, and he is trying not to hurt them. I’m trying to let go and trust him and God with all of it.
This morning I woke with a very heavy heart and was ready to break up with this man. Mostly, it’s pride and control on my part, and I realize I must wait to see God’s clear direction. Anyway, your post spoke to me, It might seem a stretch to you, but it fit to me. My journey of respect is to trust my boyfriend, although most would say dump him. This isn’t anyone else’s journey; it’s mine. The line in your post, “Today, I just want to encourage you in your journey. Whatever it looks like today and 6 years from now,” seemed straight from God. I had worried about the future, how what is happening now might signal trouble for the future.
It’s hard in today’s world to be submissive and respectful in a marriage, but even more difficult in dating. Thank you for a timely reminder.
Leah says
Grace-
Wow. What a testament to patience and respect. You are so right that in today’s world it is hard. God’s way is getting harder all the time as it becomes more and more counter cultural. But He is with us every single step of the way.
-Leah
Kimber says
I thought I would NEVER watch a Star Wars movie, but sure enough, date #2 (or 3?) there I was watching it because it’s his absolute favorite and he wanted to share it with me. And don’t tell ANYONE I said this…but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be… 😉
Leah says
Kimber-
I appreciate this. 6 years and I haven’t had to take the Star Wars bullet, but I know the day will come….
-Leah
Jeannine says
Kimber (if you are who I think you are) – you are funny! And yes, Star Wars is a good movie!
Leah says
Jeanine-
It is who you think it is 😉
-Leah