Mommy Win Moments

Mondays are long days at my house. After the bliss of having daddy home on Sunday and playing outside and doing all the fun stuff we love to do with daddy, Mondays are hard days. Everyone misses daddy. As an extra challenge is that daddy leaves right after breakfast and doesn’t come home till after bed time on Mondays. Mondays are long days for the kids since we can’t go anywhere and I don’t do a lot of piggy back rides. Mondays are long days for me – everything is a delicate balance to make it through to the end of the day as I pray for lots of patience and grace.

So the very first long Monday we all had, I wasn’t sure how many meltdowns we’d have before bed as it approached dinner time. And I wasn’t taking it in stride very well. So I thought to myself “Where is a Mommy Win? What can I do to have a win?” The answer that night was pancakes for dinner.

 And every Monday since then, my thought process has simplified to what a successful day looks likes when we’re flying completely solo for the day.

 

Would it be awesome if my house was really clean, top to bottom? Yes, but that doesn’t usually happen even on the best of days (as I write this, I’m thinking of how that really needs to be a priority this week…)

Would it be awesome if when my husband came home I showed him pictures of pressed kiddos who played peacefully all day long while I ran the house, making phone calls and whipping up the most delightful little treats from scratch? Well, yeah, because who doesn’t like treats? But that’s not a real look at our life either.

Sometimes I think I’m harder on myself when it’s “just me” – husband is traveling, working late, or I take a few days with the kids and go somewhere. Somewhere inside me, I’ve got something to prove. ‘I can do this all by myself’ I must think. I don’t say it out loud, but that’s definitely my attitude sometimes. I can do this all on my own. And really well. I need to prove to them (and it doesn’t really matter who the ‘them’ are) that I’ve got this. That I’ve got my mommy stuff together, my homemaking stuff together, and that I am disciplined and organized and can function amazingly well on very little sleep. 

The reality is, whether husband works long hours, travels, or not, I don’t have my stuff all the way together and I don’t have anything to prove. I’m a hot mess. So every day I need to resolve to wake up and do what God has in front of me to do today. With lots of prayed-for grace and patience. 

So every day I need to resolve to do what God has in front of me to do today. With lots of prayed-for grace and patience. #mommywinmoment

— Leah Heffner (@LeahHeffner) March 15, 2015

On Mommy Win Mondays, we play outside a lot. We read a lot of books. Each kid chooses a show they’d like to watch. We usually take a bath so we can play in the water. The house is a mess from me having quiet time while the kids play on their own. And during nap time, I lay down. I sleep or relax but I don’t do anything. And when dinner time rolls around, I look for a win. Pancakes. Yes. Pizza. Sure. Bacon with anything. Yup. Smoothies. Ok. Eating outside? You betcha. (Last Monday we ate outside twice!!)

And anything that gets done over and above a grace-filled day is frosting. Laundry washed, put on the line, and folded? That’s three wins. Multiplied by each load. Toy room cleaned up before kids get in bed? I can practically hear the slot machine shooting out a million dollars in quarters. No granola crumbs across my living room floor? You’re right, that’s never going to happen.

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You know, I’ve carried this idea of Mommy Win Monday into other days of the week, too, even when my husband isn’t working late. Kids want to take a bath at 10 am on a rainy day? Sure. Can we have tomato soup for lunch? Of course. I don’t see a Mommy Win Moment as letting my kids run the show or dictate the mood of the house. I see it as a way that I can communicate to them in their toddler ways that I get them, I get when they have hard days, and just like I’d love it if someone showed up with my favorite meal (anything I don’t have to cook by the way) on a hard day, I know what that can do for them. For all of us really. As we sit together and talk about our favorite things from the day.

What are your go-to Mommy Win Moments? What really works for you on a hard day? I’d love to see it in the comments, you know and totally borrow it if it’ll work at my house too.